Me and my illness (2)

And the next day she came to me in astonishment. I didn't know she
heard me all the night. She said girl i was so scared that you can
pass any time. You're really very strong. Aysha was the one who had
been very very very caring that time. No matter what what i do for
her, I can never return her for that time. I didn't go university for
so many days.
Whenever i'm ill, i call my parents from hostel that i'm ill, they
both turn very upset. I remember when my friends told my parents about
my sickness, abu was shouting at phone 'ye meri beti kisi ki bat to
maan hi nahin sakti na. Mene isko bohat mana kiya tha k lahore college
hi thik he. Pindi itna door mat jao. Yahan hamari jan azaab me ai
rehti he' and at the end he said slowly 'is ko kahin le jao beta. Is
ka khayal rakhna'. I was shifted at baray abu's home for a week. Met a
police physician there who advised me tablet "montika" for allergy.
And banned my morning and evening walk because he said pollen are very
active at those times. That tablet remained very effective and his
advise too.
I remember the days when i was kept in sunlight for the whole days. I
was given bath after weeks. I used to wear double caps and jackets in
school. Over packed as compared to other kids. Even from my childhood,
i remembered the names of my medicine and my doctors. Ami sometimes
tell me how i pronounced some of my medicine. Ventolin was usually
given to me for my breathing. Then Butamin. Nebulizing was regular.
Inhaler was in my pocket all the time. Strepsils is the most chewed
toffee. Erythrocine, hydrillin, benadryll, phanergan were all time
syrups with me. I'm much thankful to Allah that i'm much recovered
now. But i can't forget the nights when i used to have even five
pillows under my neck to ease my breaths.
I didn't let ami and pupho all the night. Even didn't let them turn
their face. I forced them to keep their eyes open and keep their face
on my side. If they slept, i woke them up again.
Some funny incidents are also linked with my illness. Once i remember
pupho took me to the doctor (his name was asghar) and fortunately i
got some time to talk with him in loneliness. I told him that no one
allows me to eat my favorite food. They all stop me from eating
whatever i like. I cant drink tasteless 'yakhni' all the time
secondly, they dont let me play (i always was stopped from touching
mud or clay because its cold in winters but i was always attracted
towards it). And he was very nice. He advised my pupho that i'll
recover soon if i'll be given my desired food ato eat :-) :-) :-) and
allowed to do what i want. I remember that day was very lucky for me
pupho took me for shopping and i was given whatever i pointed :-) i
was allowed to eat all the fried things and everyone wondered that i
really recovered soon that time :-) abu says that he never remained
that much worried for anything else. You're my baby who made me think
too much. He used to keep thinking for hours when i got my foot
operated due to clots in it. I couldn't walk. I lost the charms of so
many functions of my family. At even fatima baji's wedding i was ill.
I wore highnecks with lehangd :D :D
everyone praise me that i'm a brave girl i fought for so long with my
illness. But i think its not my bravery. Its just life. I had to
remain alive because i had to spend the written days of my life. . .
I'm happy that i don't get that much ill now there're many factors for
that. My care, my age, the anti allergic tablet. The cleaner
environment in Pindi & islamabad. Small cuts or wounds aren't a
problem for me now. I can take big capsules. I take so much care of me
specially when i'm at hostel. Thats the reason i think that i don't
get much ill there and when i come home, i turn so careless like these
days so i'm ill again. I had been eating 'achaar' (pickle) when there
was no one to stop me! But i'm planning to really stop being careless
because otherwise this 'bimari' wont leave me